While most physicians are willing to treat the effects of physical aging, other than my wife, I haven’t run into many that are willing to deal with the sexual effects of aging. “He just doesn’t seem to be that interested anymore” is a common statement that I hear on a regular basis. Mind you, most women also admit that they aren’t very interested in sex either.
Why? They have succumbed to society’s theory that as you grow older sex isn’t that important anymore. Even if you haven’t read about the physical and mental benefits of an orgasm; you have to admit that the orgasm isn’t something that most people willingly give up. The orgasm has benefits that include better mental well-being, anti-depressant properties, and increased ability to handle the daily stressors that everyone experiences.
Why give up the orgasm? It takes too much work and “to be honest, sex is pretty much a chore that I feel I have to try to accomplish on a monthly or semi-monthly basis to keep him happy”. Orgasms become increasingly difficult as we age.
From the guy’s standpoint- “I’m still very much in love with her, but sex isn’t as stimulating as it was when she was younger. I have to try harder to help her reach orgasm and that isn’t easy as my stamina isn’t like it was when I was younger.”
From the gal’s viewpoint- “Sex is something that doesn’t come easy anymore. He doesn’t give me the foreplay I need to achieve an orgasm on a regular basis.”
Gals- give the guys a break. We know that stamina decreases along with the decrease in testosterone (T) production. If he has issues, have him get his T checked! Most docs just check total testosterone, while free T is the number that matters. Show me a guy that has problems with his libido, decreased energy levels, loss of muscle mass, and high cholesterol and I’ll show you a guy that has low or borderline low free testosterone.
What about the ladies? As women age and hormone levels decrease they lose erectile tissue. What does this mean? Breast mass is lost, the clitoris isn’t as pronounced during sex, and the G spot loses volume. Sounds like the perfect storm for less pleasure during sex, right?
Bio-identical hormone replacement therapy (BHRT) has a better than 75 year safety history; so I am very comfortable recommending it to my patients. Will that fix all issues? BHRT may revitalize vaginal mucosa and may bring new life to erectile tissue but it won’t fix some of the issues that occur during the aging process that are exacerbated by the trauma of childbirth. While vaginal deliveries are the method of choice (if it is an option) for bringing a new life into the world, they don’t do wonderful things for the vagina in terms of insuring that everything snaps back into place. Many women have told me that sex is never the same after the first kid boldly blazes a trail into a new world through the same organ that is used for sexual pleasure.
That’s right. Things get stretched! If you have issues with incontinence or urine leak, surgery may be the right choice for you. Is there a less invasive option that will also help make sex more pleasurable? It’s called G-spot augmentation.
G-Spot augmentation or G-spot injection involves placing a small amount of naturally occurring dermal filler (Juvederm, for example) in the body of the G-spot. The result? The G-spot is not only more prominent but the vagina is a little bit tighter. Sex is more pleasurable for you again and he doesn’t have to work near as hard to achieve the “impossible dream”. Need some help in the bedroom? Ask me about it!
Disclaimer: Dr Stephen Rath, MD, DABA is a board certified anesthesiologist, Air Force flight surgeon, FAA AME, paramedic, ski patroller, and pilot as well as the owner and medical director of Fusion Medical Spa located in Ruidoso, NM. He is committed to making great changes before he is committed. Comments or questions? His email address is: DrRath@FusionMedicalSpa.net.